Jam Packed Blog Post

I have not updated my post regarding the URA trip and all, and Jyh Huei is out in Singapore for a few days, and my sisters is out. So yeah, hectic hectic and loving it. Woot!

First up URA. Haha! I know I know. This trip has passed for who-knows how many days already. But heck care? I'm still gonna post it! MUAHAHA!

For those who don't know who Nelson is, let me introduce you to him, wan? Don't want ar? Why? Cz he carry tennis racquet and smiling as if he wanna smack you izzit? Don't scared don't scared. Thomas ko ko over here. Got anything tell me okay?And you guys got to know what boys in my class can do! They're impressive!

See what they're doing? YES! THEY'RE PEEING IN A CIRCLE!!!!!! IN THE PUBLIC! GOSH!

And now, bachelor number two, Kah Xian! If you were to look properly at this picture, you'll notice that his hands are trailing to somewhere. He's holding his "little brother" right?? No?? Hmmmmm.......

And don't this picture reminds you of those Chinese alter or whatever you call it? Those with guan ying niang niang, tu di kong and what not? Haha! Just wondering, are they worshipping that picture??

And oh and oh and oh!!!!! I'm a big fan of Miss Lim!

There, just her back, but still, I'm a big fan of her! LOL!Next up, Jyh Huei's stay in Singapore! Sorry Jyh Huei, couldn't do much for you cz busy with homework, school, more homework, a bit of studies, and yes, time constrain. Sorry yea. And oh, sorry for the lack of space. Timing is really bad.

But before that, i've got to comment about something! OMG! Jyh Huei! You snore like a trombone, trumpet - loud and well, LOUD!

Hmm..anyway, Jyh Huei reached my place on early Sunday morning, causing me to waste one day of my weekend (because I lose my sleep! No sleep = no weekend!!). And I became practically a walking zombie for the day. Hmm!!

ANYWAY!

Went to Sim Lim and Singapore Art Museum (by accident! Not on purpose wan).

We were trying to go to Sim Lim, when, well, I lead Jyh Huei to the wrong route and we eventually got lost. HAHA! Hmmm! We went asking around "Excuse me sir, may I know how to go to Sim Lim from here?". That's out question.

We get replies like "Sim Lim ar?? Er, you walk straight from here, then turn left, then walk straight again, then turn left again. Then straight again. Then you'll see Sim Lim."

And a few other variations. Crap! Follow those instructions land us at Singapore Art Museum!!! Luckily it's free on Sunday. Woot! So we took advantage to patronize the rather deserted place.

***************fast forward****************************

This place is supposed to be for kids. Hmm...i'm a small kid right? Still young and youthful. We went in and we saw this,

Oh Boy Oh Boy Oh Boyyyy!! Mummy Mummy! We can draw! Mummy Mummy! I wanna use crayon!

Masterpiece! Certified toilet trained!

And then and then and then! There are Sesame Street character in this museum!

BIG BIRD!

And there's this 881 Durian's bra on display.

Then Then Then, one guy came and say "Excuse me sir, no photo taking please." =.="

I tell you, this museum, infested with things that kids cannot see and hear. I went to this room whereby, there's this sound, as if people were having sex or something, moaning and what not. Gosh! And I saw an uncle inside, and I looked at him, he looked at me. Grinning. OMG! Scary scary.

Even outside of the museum!

The 2 puppet on the right side seems more civilised. However! The two on the left seems to be molesting each other!!!

Now, my sisters. They came, they saw, they baked. And bake they did. Brownies.

GOSH!!!!!!!!!!! DON'T IT JUST LOOK LIKE A CHAO DA DEAD VOLCANO IN SOME RURAL ISLAND ON SOME PLANET SUPER NEAR TO THE SUN???

And one of my sister has got a pair of hairy purple testicles hanging around her handphone. Cool eh?

MUMMY MUMMY! I DON'T WANT!!!!

VOLCANOES! CRATERS! DENT! OIL! PUSTULES!!!!!!!

Mummy! Why you say use that product can heal wan??? NO CHANGE!

Mummy! Why you say drink that wan can heal wan??? NO CHANGE!

Mummy! Why you say do that wan can heal wan??? NO CHANGE!

Mummy! Why my face like your's wan??? NO FAIR!

Mummy! Why other's don't have wan??? NO FAIR!

Mummy! Why I cannot be bomb??? NO FAIR!

MUMMY!!!!!

You know how hard is it for me to go to school or not?!?!?!?! Especially when there's Chemistry!! Got bombs in class, then then then, I don't dare go near lar! Cz Cz Cz! Self-concious!

Haih, saddening!

MUMMY!!!!!

I DON'T WANNA LOOK LIKE THE GUNS, GERMS AND STEEL DE CHARACTER! THOSE THAT GOT INFESTED BY SMALL POX!!! I DOWAN I DOWAN!!!!!

I vely the sad. I donch noe hao me goin to servaiv fo the nex fiu wik. Plis plis facie, donch bullie me liao. Me vely the unstabel nao. Goin coo koo liao. Might go coo koo ciao later. Donch see me happi happi jumming alound. I inside vely strong feelin wan crai. SAD HOR???

我直要青春, 不要豆

Boring, Boring, Bored! The End of FartBoy and LabiaGirl

The boredom of staying at home, having nothing but you, your computer, and a few books piling around, is almost indentical to trapping in a highly lighted room, with your eyelid forced open, inextricable!

Computer:
Sitting in front of a monitor, feeling as though in the mids of nothingness, staring blankly at what seems to be a logo of Acer and a signed in account of Windows Live Messenger, chatting with ghost of Rwanda. Bah! How sickening!

Lately, the speed of the internet connection has been declining, and it evidently came to a near halt, almost snail-like. Couldn't even download a small fraction of a not-so-large file in half an hour. Pathetic! And all that I can do to relieve myself of such "burden" from the boredom of a "luxurious jail" is to check for movie timing and go out on a movie excursion, although the fact is, i've been using this method very frequently and about to declare bankruptcy. Pun intended.

Thou shall not regurgitate.
Thou shall not be kangaroo.
Thou shall not shoot thee mouth.
Thou shall implement text analysis.
Thou shall religiously love question analysis.
Thou shall honour my teaching.
Thou shall answer my question with my answer.
Thou have no brain and thou needs mua.
Thou shall score with thy piety on me.
Thou shall talk no cock.

Ten Commandments of Grottesca Pukimak.

Books:

Grr. As much as I love books, books can be really texting on our eyes and at times, damaging to our brains. "Bad woman...evil...sell her sarong...gamble...whore...you sima-yan" is the first sentence of the starting of the story from the book For My Hands Only by Stephen Ling. Interesting I thought, but the more i read the more fatique I feel. My mind kept wandering into the unknown, trying to catch hold of a sense of something, a sense of fun or of that sort.

JK Rowling a magnificent woman, Cecilia Ahern awaits me, Thomas Harris waiting to strike with a vengeance, Robert Harris, preparing to ambush, and Richard Robinson, eagerly wanting to educate.

The Adventure of FartBoy and LabiaGirl

Continuation of episode 1 and episode 2.

Thomas made his jump. He leapt forward, just in time to evade the retractable light sabre from crashing mercilessly onto his backside. He couldn't make out his position. Either diving or sinking, he could only struggle on for dear life as the lesbians release their now, magnified twin tower with a longkang in the middle.

Minutes later, he found himself in The Asshole. Thomas stretched his hands out, hoping he could make contact with a living being - human being. However, his hopes are about to be broken down to pieces, disappointing him.

All of a sudden, an extremely malicious smell arose as he struggled to reduce the inhalation of, what he thought, highly toxicated fumes. The stench grew stronger through time. Thomas finally lost himself and knelt. His legs wabbling, beaten by what he thought, gay fart.

A hand appeared in front of him. "Hi. You seem troubled. How can I help you?" exclaimed a perfectly human-looking man, except for the extraordinary sized anus. FartBoy then explained his origin, and promised to help Thomas.

Thomas screamed in exhilaration. His thought of avenging his rights to be in class grew, as he dream of gays and lesbians drenched in a magma filled volcano.

Soon, they are on their way. They climb out from what seemed to be a faeces-filled toilet bowl. Thomas didn't care. FartBoy is advancing fast with the help of his extra venomous fart, pushing him further. There, in the Garden of Eden, they spotted the gays and lesbians. Thomas lunged forward grabbing his retractable light sabre while shouting "Cockenaden! Go die die lar you!".

Before he could reach them, a screeching sound came to realisation, and there, standing on the top of the mountain, was LabiaGirl. Her appearance, normal, but her pelvis, out of this world. Extreme in size, with what seems to be liquid flowing ferociously, everywhere.

FartBoy instantly recognised her. He lunged forward, and shouted "Mofo! You pushed me into the bloody cave!".

"Sorry boy, I did that to save you. I was trying to look for you all this while. I research, over and over again, to indentify the best method to locate you. And you see the result. I have transformed, son."

The both of them hugged. The gays and lesbians couldn't take such scene. They went and commit sucide.

Thomas was freed from the gripping of threat! He then, live happily ever after. WOOT!

OMFG Shrek's Dr. EVIL, and Mr Austin Power!!!! Shagman OMFG

Actually, I was suspicious over this for quite some time. Mike Myer was featured in Ellen Degenerous Show ya see. And I watch that show pretty often. They were talking and talking and this Mike guy, Ellen said he's an actor in Austin Power!

I was like WTF!!! And now, i'm here, to reveal his true, dark indentity. Behold! Your favourite SHREK!

And the voice behind it, Miiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiikkeeeeeeeeeeeeeee MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYeeeeeeeerrrrr!!

Looks familiar? OH YES HE IS!!! BECAUSE, he is the one and only, Dr Evil and Austin Power!! OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG! This show somehow remind me of the ecentric Jasmond!

The cheeky, and dirty Austin Power,

and Dr Evil with his little minion, Mini Me.

So surprised am I, oh yes! Shrek is the two of them. Don't know if i'm looking forward to watching Shrek anymore!

****************************************************************************

Anyway, was in the bus the other day, and there's this dude, I'll just call him Darlie *wink*. He came into the bus, and almost instantly, started shouting indignantly. He was cursing at the guy that, I don't know for what reason, was landing his foot on one of the seat.

Mr Darlie, came shouting "DEI! THIS IS A SEAT YOU NO! WHY YOU PUTTING YOU LEG????? YOU NO BLAIN?"

Then almost instantly after that, i heard him saying "Kanina Singaporeans". I don't know if I heard correctly or not, but I...think....i heard just that. WTF? What has that got to do with Singaporeans?

Anyway, after that, the guy whom he just screamed at, obeyed obediently, albeit, bamboozled by the commotion. He then, took out his handphone and started texting.

Mr Darlie, then, starts again.

"YOU YOU! YOU CALLING YOU FLEN AR? THEY GO WHERE YOU TELL ME? YOU TELL ME!! I GO DOWN! SAY!"

He thought that poor helpless ragged man was calling his gang! What a pathetic ignoramus nincompoop! I couldn't help but to giggle a bit. Then he looked at me. Oh dear, what have I done. And then he looked away and started yabbing away things that sounded like chants.

Jee. Public transport sure is good as hell huh? I mean literally. As good as hell can give.